I felt I wanted to get down on paper all the Lord had done for me these past few weeks. 1982 has been a very hard year financially for us and as I entered 1983 I had a great Hope that 1983 was going to be different. I just knew it was going to be a turning point.

In the middle of the night, upon Pollyann’s first day back at PLU we received a call from her saying that she had severe stomach pains. She ended up being taken by the paramedics to Good Samaritan Hospital where they couldn’t find out what was wrong but drugged her until the pain subsided. Dick picked her up at 4:00am and she slept until 5:30pm on Tuesday afternoon. She seemed better and we planned on taking her back to school Wednesday evening, when the pain returned. She spent 3 hours that evening at Tacoma General Emergency room in extreme pain and then spent the night when they couldn’t find out what was wrong and came home at 3 the next afternoon. (In addition, Pollyann was no longer under our insurance as of November 19. She was now 19 and at this time was uninsured.) She came home Thursday and seemed better but the pain returned Friday evening and we took her to Allenmore Emergency for shots for pain. On Monday morning she had Upper GI x-rays but still nothing could be found. All the doctor could tell us was that it was probably stress related.

During that week I became very depressed and felt that I had been forsaken by God. I felt I was lying face down in a pit and just decided to stay there until the Lord decided to pick me up. It was just too painful to feel hope and then be knocked down again.

Dick was in a very similar state and we did not feel like going to Sunday School and leading the class on the Sunday following that horrible week. I did feel strong though, that we couldn’t just go into the lesson without sharing our feelings and what had happened that week. I did just that and then at the of the class John Weber said he felt the class should pray for us and for Pollyann.  And he did pray for us, as did Wes Anderson and Bob Brooke. And healing began to come to me as those dear men prayer so beautifully and so powerfully. As we left class several people gave us scripture and that, along with some Jane had given me during the week, began to speak to my heart. I saw the situation from a different perspective.

These were the verses that were so helpful to me:

• II Corinthians 4:8 “We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed but not driven to despair; persecuted but not forsaken, struck down but not destroyed- always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be manifested in our bodies.”
• Matthew 7:25 “And the rain fell, and the floods came and the winds blew and beat upon that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock.”
• Romans 8:24-25 “Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with with patience.”
• Psalms 39:7 “And now Lord, for what do I wait? My hope is in the thee.”

And also these verses: Romans 12:12, Psalms 131, Psalms 103:1-5, Psalms 39:7, Proverbs 10:28, Psalms 3:3, Psalms 28:7, Psalms 84:11a, Psalms 119:114

As I began to really HEAR what these verses were saying, this is what the Lord showed me… I was putting my hope in the wrong things, and hoping in “a job”. Or hoping in 1983 when I should be hoping “in God” and “In the Word” and “In the Unseen”.

Then as I read II Corinthians 4:8 I realized that this hadn’t really been a life verse with me and I recalled Juan Carlos Ortiz words as he said he could tell what kind of Christian you were by what you had underlined in your Bible. I took offense at this because I probably had every happy verse underlined in mine. Perhaps I just hadn’t needed a verse like II Corinthians 4:8 before, but now I did and was blessed by it, as well as Psalms 103:4.

As I read Psalms 131 and Matthew 7:25 together a beautiful picture came into my mind. I was no longer in the bottom of a dark pit. But I was inside a cozy house, our living room on Fox Island with a big fire going and the rain beating outside and the wind howling and the waves were wild, but I was quiet, secure, warm, and peaceful because I was resting in the arms of God. He was my shield and protector from the storm about me.

As I sat in my protected place looking down at where I had come from, I was feeling ashamed and guilty for having been there and for feeling that God had forsaken me. In this moment, the Lord very gently spoke to my heart saying “Both Jesus and David cried out, ‘Why have you forsaken me’, and I can forgive you for this also.”

Theses two verses have new meaning to me too. Rather than saying when the storms come, “Oh, why has this happened to me!”, I shall claim I Peter 4:12,13 and James 1:2-4.

During that week our hearts were lifted in so many ways as so many were praying for us. Through gifts of many that week, all the hospital bills were taken care of. That was very hard to receive, but we are so thankful and we take it as from the Lord. I have never felt such a distinct separation between my Spirit, Soul, and Body as I did during this healing time. It was interesting to me to see each part touched and healing separately and then to see how uniquely each part affected the whole.

We just want to thank our Sunday School Class and our family for being so supportive and for praying for us during these past two weeks.